Little Red Riding Hood
by Koneko Yuy
Summary: Why boredom is never a good thing with Ko-chan... slight yaoi, slight shonen ai


Little Red Riding Hood  
Disclaimers: I don't own Gundam Wing, I don't own the original Red Riding Hood...  
Rating: PG-13. I think.....  
Pairings: Implied 2x1... *shrugs*  
Warnings: Quatre in a dress... Seriously cute....  
Notes: I need notes? Er... I want my Gundam Chicken!!!! Um.... *shrugs* I need something to do....

Phobos: You made me Red Riding Hood?  
Yeah. So?  
Phobos: *sighs* .....  
Go get into costume, Phobos....  
Phobos: Fine, fine... *walks off*

(Once upon a time, there was a little girl that everyone called Red Riding Hood.)

Phobos: *peeks out* I'm not little, you know.

(I know you're not! It's just how the story goes!)

Phobos: *steps out in the open, dressed in her normal outfit along with a red cloak around her neck* /Must/ I be Red Riding Hood?

(Please? I /swear/ I haven't been watching Tex Avery's Red Hot Riding Hood!)

Phobos: Better not have... *looks around* There's no one here!

(You've been arguing with me. Can we continue?)

Phobos: I suppose.

(Thank you. Now, one day, Red's mother...)

*Quatre gets shoved out in the open. Quatre is wearing a blue dress, a white apron, and blue high heels*

Quatre: *whimpers* Ko!

(Hm?)

Phobos: *points at Quatre and laughs*

Quatre: Phobos!

(Anyway... one day, Red's mother asked her daughter to deliver a basket of goodies to Red's ailing grandmother who lived at the other end of the woods.)

Quatre: *gratefully hands over the basket he was holding*

Phobos: Eh? *looks in the basket* Holy...! *slams the lid down* Who's the grandmother?!

(Can't tell. So, anyway, Red was sent on her way.)

Quatre: Oh, and 'Red'? Don't stray far from the path and don't talk to any strangers.

Phobos: Yeah, yeah. *waves him off*

(Trowa: *from his spot by the author* Ko's as strange as they come.  
Koneko: Hey!!  
Candy: *also by the author* *snickers*)

Quatre: *ignoring Ko and the two with her* I have things to do, my dear, so I must take my leave, daughter mine.

(Candy: Daughter mine? *laughs*  
Trowa: Ho boy...  
Koneko: ....Can I continue without conflict from you two?  
Both: *shake their heads rapidly*)

Phobos: Sure, Mother. I have to take my start on my journey.

Quatre: *happily leaves the stage*

Phobos: *exits the stage from the opposite side*

(Red cautiously entered the forest.)

Phobos: *walks on the new set and sees all the trees*

(When she realized it was safe, she started to skip on her merry way.)

Phobos: I DON'T skip and I'm NOT merry.

(Okay, okay. Walked on her way. Happy?)

Phobos: Very.

(Now, in the woods, there lived a big, bad wolf.)

Heero: *walks out from behind a tree. A pair of silver-gray ears are atop his head and a long silver-gray tail wraps itself around his upper thigh* ....

(*blinks* Um...)

Phobos: *sighs* You see Heero looking like a wolf and you forget the story?!

(Candy: *giggles*  
Koneko: He's a cute wolf! Sorry!)

Heero: Can we get a move on it? I have a piggy to kill and if I remember this story, I have a 'grandmother' to eat.

Phobos: Does it involve the stuff in this basket? *holds up the basket*

(Maybe... And Heero, you owe me for /your/ part.)

Heero: No playing with my tail.

Phobos: *blinks* WHAT?!

(I can't give Heero up for Lent.... Plus, there's that wedding picture....)

Heero: Just /get/ on with it!

(Okay, okay... Now, the wolf approached Red.)

Heero: *glares at the author*

Phobos: *whimpers* Don't, Hee-senshi! She might do the 'Red Hot Riding Hood' version!

Heero: *stops and looks at Phobos* And where are you off to, little lady?

Phobos: *regains her composure* I'm delivering goodies to my ailing grandmother who lives at the edge of the woods.

Heero: *nodding* I see...

(Now, the droolsome wolf looked around and saw a meadow of flowers.)

Heero: A meadow? We're on some soundstage.

Phobos: This /is/ Ko we're talking about. Stranger things /have/ happened.

(I still have that Immortal fic to finish.... /That/ isn't going as planned.... Anyway....)

Heero: *sighs and looks at his script* Would your grandmother like some flowers?

Phobos: *groaning at the lameness of the lines* I bet that would make her day! *stops the sappy lines* Who /is/ the grandmother anyway?!

Heero: Think, Phoenix. If I'm the wolf, /who/ do you think is the grandmother?

Phobos: Lessee... handcuffs... Duo?

Heero: Bravo.

Phobos: .....

(Moving on... While Red was picking flowers, the wolf slipped off to Red's grandmother's house.)

Heero: *cautiously approaches the 'cabin' marked 'Grandmother's house'*

(Why are you being so cautious?)

Heero: It could be J behind that door.

(Oh. *checks* It's not.)

Heero: Good. *knocks on the door* Duo?

Duo: *from inside* Wha? Who is it?

Heero: *in a seductive voice* Just a wolf that needs to be taught a lesson.

Duo: *laughs*

(That's NOT what your line is!! Heero!)

Heero: *gives Koneko a grin and sneaks in the house*

(*sighs* Anyway... Red came out of the forest and went up to the door.)

Phobos: *walks out on stage, looks at the 'cabin' and sits down*

(Go up to the door and knock!)

Phobos: *shakes her head*

(Why not?)

*low moans, yelps, and growls come from the 'cabin'*

Phobos: They're busy. Sounds like they're making a 2x1 lemon.

(*sighs* Why me?)

Phobos: Why not? End this already. Call it /your/ sanity, psycho kitty.

(Fine... *looks at the 'cabin' with the 2x1 lemon in progress*)

The End


End file.
